MY INAUGURATION

My inauguration shall take place at 11:00a.m. No more 7 or 8 o’clock swearing in. I want the whole country to be awake when I’m sworn in, this isn’t a Yar’adua presidency. I shall arrive in an el-Rufai bus adorning the Nigerian flag and presidential seal with all my staff. As always the inauguration shall take place at Eagles Square. The purpose of the bus is to signify a new change in government, a symbol of the time of the common man.

At 12:00p.m, I shall address both chambers of the house at the National Assembly and ask them to cut their July/August holiday short. Seeing as I shall be sworn on May 31st, I need them working for more than a month. Governance is not a holiday, IT IS A JOB and I need my soldiers with me. It will be my first proposal to the house. All that money they’re being paid, they can afford to forfeit half their holiday. And thus starts my first conflict with the house.

At 3p.m, I shall meet with the men of the Nigerian Army and talk of/about our various peace keeping missions abroad, as well as the ones in our dear nation like the Niger Delta and Jos and the need to secure our borders from unwanted individuals. At 5p.m, I shall meet the youth organizations and various other groups who helped campaign for me and show some gratitude. This is of course if I was truly voted in and not unconstitutionally rigged in like *ahem*, you know who, what with this charade we have called democracy.

At 8p.m, we shall have the state dinner. All government officials as well as foreign diplomats will be invited, not to mention members of the press. The dinner shall be at the State House. If not, there’s always the I.C.C (International Conference Center).

At 10p.m, it’s off to bed as I pray God grants me the wisdom to lead my people and accomplish what has never been done. I then kiss my wife (that woman whose being by my side when I was a nobody that used to walk and enter bus before being able to buy Tokunbo car) and then face the next four years of my life under the most scrutiny any individual in this country can go through. A prison full of luxuries.


BELOW IS A DETAILED OUTLINE FOR THE DAY:

INAUGURATION DAY ACTIVITIES


10:30 President shall depart the villa by bus.

11:00 Inauguration shall start

12:00 NASS Address

15:00 Meeting with military personnel (Army Ball)

17:00 Meeting with youth organizations (Youth Ball)

20:00 Evening Ball at Villa


Side Note: The Youth Ball shall start at 16:30; the President shall be expected by 17:00. The Evening Ball shall last from 20:00-22:00.

Concerning the public bus, in which the president shall be transported in, a bus shall be chosen, cleaned and have no advert placements. It shall be decorated with the Nigerian flag colours and Presidential Seal, which shall be taken off by the day’s end. The chosen driver of the bus shall be paid a sum of N500, 000.

THE DAY AFTER THE ELECTIONS

It’s the day after the elections and I have been confirmed the winner of the 2011 election. The results had been mentioned in the early hours of the morning. My phone hasn’t stopped ringing, with friends and well-wishers calling me, “Mr. President”. I say my morning prayers and pray God guides me through the next four years. I’ve already decided who will make my cabinet, Federal Character is about to be thrown out the door.

As the sun rises and brings in a new day, I call those who have made my campaign team, some of who will still serve under my administration. The first order of the day is to thank the Nigerian public and to also visit the INEC office and congratulate them on holding a free and fair election this time. Although I don’t see how this was possible with Maurice Iwu in charge, although I heard the youth of Nigeria under such groups as Enough is Enough Nigeria made sure their every votes were counted.

I also meet with military officials, specifically the JTF (Joint Task Force) to discuss the situation in the Niger Delta and tell them we will double troops for what is about to come. I will also have a secret meeting with senior military brass to talk “emergency exits” in the case of another Jos crisis. In reality this will be a meeting on how if need be Plateau State will be divided between neighbouring states. It shall be called, “The Plateau Solution” and shall serve as a possible exit strategy to any other state that gets caught up in sectarian violence. Imagine if the public knew of this, but as a soon to be head-of-state I have to take bold decisions.

I shall also discuss with my team about who will head my proposed Audit Bureau, which will check the every financial transactions of the ministries. Although not capable of arrests on its own, the Audit Bureau will partner with EFCC when it comes to catching culprits. There will be a visit to the Department of Statistics at CBN to discuss the important of gathering statistics, specifically that of people who die in hospitals. The sooner we know we know what kills us the most, the better we will have an idea on helping the health sector on needed equipments and medicine. This will obvious involve the Health ministry.

All these meetings don’t have to take place in one day of course. What’s important is that in the days leading to my inauguration, I have a clear vision of what I want to accomplish in my first months. There will be no promise of an “energy emergency” like my predecessor had and no 7-point agendas either. Perhaps my biggest challenge will be convincing the political system to get rid of Federal Character when it comes to choosing my cabinet; you know how Nigerian politicians love politicking. It is then I will be accused of serving a Northern agenda or working for the South (a puppet with a Northern face, they’ll say). Clearly I am not going to please everybody and some states will claim that they are not represented. I believe that’s what your House of Representatives are for; to represent every region of every state. This shouldn’t have to include the ministers of my cabinet. If I can’t have capable hands with me, just because one state doesn’t have a minister, there’s already a problem! My headaches have begun!

Four or eight years down the line, I will face an even similar challenge as I try to convince my party to get rid of zoning. “He wants his fellow Northerner to continue.” “He wants the South to regain power again”. Such and such will be said. Surely it isn’t easy to be president; well at least I pray I have my health through it all!

Note: Watch out for my inauguration plans!

OF STATES AND KINGDOMS

We all know the facts: there are 36 states, 1 federal capital territory, 6 geo-political states and numerous kingdoms spread from the North to the East and from the South to the West, yet today those facts maybe changed if some people have their ways. Groups of people from different ethnicities and religions have been calling for the creation of more states for reasons best known to them. Let me state clearly I am not against these people or anyone who wishes to see the creation of a new state. I am interested in knowing of what benefit it is to the greater Nigeria. Also in some states we’ve seen the creation of new emirates and kingdoms, Borno being the latest examples.

Despite the fact that we have states run by Governors, we find emirates and kingdoms within which are ruled by emirs and chiefs respectively. How much influence these kingdoms have depends largely on the followers but we know Abacha did once remove a former Sultan of Sokoto, which means the Federal Government seems to have a larger autonomy over them. Apart from the Sultan of Sokoto who serves as a figure head of the nation’s Muslim population, all other traditional rulers rule over a specified area of land, which -without being prejudice here- puts the Sultan a tad above them, for while his Caliphate may be in Sokoto he presides over a populace not specified to any state, like the head of CAN does. Which puts him out of the next equation: understanding that these traditional kingdoms serve as a link to our pre-colonial past, some have argued for and against them.

Most people, who argue for, see the rulers and kingdoms as a connection to our past and for their great influence in society. Those who have argued against, have citied the lack of influence of some, as well as what they see as excess money being spent on the rulers by the federal government. My reason for excluding the Sultan of Sokoto from the rest of the rulers is simply because (among other things) going by our recent history of violence (and politics), it is clear we need representatives for the two major religions of this country. The head of CAN is not a traditional title as no such position existed pre-colonialism, but after. What makes the issue of traditional kingdoms even trickier is the fact that the rulers are divided into first class, second class and third class, which means one group, has a higher autonomy over the other and so on.

Lest we forget, it was through these various traditional kingdoms that the colonials were able to establish what will eventually become Nigeria. Some kingdoms were more receptive to the colonials, others weren’t. Furthermore some states were created based on the existing emirate(s)/kingdom(s) within. An example would be Kano state. It would be impossible to imagine a Kano state without a Kano emirate, yet a Kano emirate without a Kano state is quite plausible. Likewise in the Southern part of the country we have Oyo state, whose creation can be said to have been based on the existing Oyo Kingdom. Again in the North-East, we have Borno state, whose existence too can be said to have been based on its Kanem-Borno empire. Sokoto is there, we can go on and on, yet the argument for more states and the existence of traditional kingdoms is one that has always opened the door for debate.

Perhaps to clear the air on the issue, I should state my stand on both. First of all I believe there are enough states in Nigeria, but if a proposed state is seen to bring some sort of economical welfare to the greater nation and its people (as some have claimed) then I think it should be seriously considered, but not necessarily created. Also if the creation of states leads to peace, say for example, in the case of another Plateau crisis (as has happened quite recently), then as heartbreaking as it may be for some, it should be seriously considered. As for traditional kingdoms, I can respect them, particularly their past. I do however think there are enough and no newer ones should be established.

So do you think Nigeria needs more states and why? And are you for or against the traditional kingdoms? One Nigeria!